Hoping It won't Drag(0n)...

Feng Shui wise, I am in for a turbulent year. The coming Chinese new year is the year of the Water Dragon and me being a wood dragon born in the month of the water dog on the day of the horse in the hour of the rat, will have terrible luck next year. In fact, I did a whole life cycle forecast and it seems that my luck will only change when the stars are in my favor when I am 120 years old..... I can't wait.

This is the my 4th cycle of the zodiac. For the uninitiated, the Chinese Zodiac has twelve animals in it. They are Rat, Ox, Tiger, Rabbit, Dragon, Snake, Horse, Goat, Monkey, Rooster, Dog & Pig (source: wikipedia.... where else).

Ok, enough of that. I actually have a lot of hope for this year. I need to have this year to be a good year. According to this website I was using to assess my luck (using a fake name) I have to find a good Chinese name for myself to change my luck. I was thinking Alan Tam, or Donnie Yen... Or Jackie Chan. I'll give it a good thought.

What I've decided to do this year is to finish some of the stuff I started to do, some of them 4 or 5 years ago. One of them is this novel I am writing. Actual, two novels, both are crappy.. that I'm sure. One is in Malay and one in English. I will write it in between my Applied Business Research (ABR) Paper... because, ABR is so boring, I need the distraction.

OK. That is the scariest thing I have done today... to actually declare that I will finish something I started. To set a goal... To make a (gulp) commitment.

I should do this more often.

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7 Days to Live

This coming Friday, on December 21, 2012, the planet Nibiru, last seen only by the ancient Sumerians a few thousand years ago, will come around and pass so near our earth that it will shift the poles and cause a cataclysm, wiping all living things on our planet. According to Nancy Lieder, this phenomenon was first predicted to happen in 2003, but when nothing happened then, she postponed it to 2012. Ms Lieder claimed that she was abducted by aliens when she was young and later released so that she can warn all of us of the impending end of the world. Something is going to happen on December 21, some people insists, because that is the last day on the Mayan Calendar. The Mayan Calendar it seems is as accurate as the atomic clock, marking exactly the celestial events for the last 5,000 years. Some say that a meteor will fall to earth and we will then go the way of the dinosaurs. Or.... a huge solar flare occurs, engulfing and annihilating all planets in its path, earth...

Another phase in life.... hers and mine...

I have been in a melancholy mood. I have been unmotivated, wishing that I don't have to go to work. Although, I try to be the type of parent that is practical and always encouraged my children to be independent and self-sufficient, I guess I've always wanted to be there for them. Now, there is this realization that my eldest daughter, doesn't need me anymore. Sending her to college last Sunday, it suddenly occurred to me that she will, from now on, be spending more time away from us. This is what has put me in a pensive mood. And, in a couple of years, my eldest son will leave us and then my other daughter, then finally, my youngest son. I look back at the last 17 years of raising her, I wish I had been a better parent. I wish I was had shown more patience and compassion rather than anger and edginess. I wish I had shown more composure than agitation. Maybe, that is why I find it hard to let go. I have this feeling that I haven't done enough, that I must hang on ...

Pak Mat Beca

I started school in 1971. I went to Sekolah Ismail (Dua), as far as I am concerned the only primary school in the whole universe and every kid must go there or the government will put their parents away forever. The "Dua" or Two (2), does not mean there were two Sekolah Ismails. There was only one, except that there were two sessions, morning and afternoon. When I started in standard one, I was in the morning session. Apparently, somehow, the two Ismails alternate, and I really can't recall ever having to go to school in the afternoon. Every morning, my cousin, the late Hashimah Hashim (Allah bless her soul), and I would wait for Pak Mat to pick us up in his beca, his trishaw. And, until I changed school in 1976 (that's another story to tell), Pak Mat and his beca would take me to school every school day. I know of no other way to go to school and I did not really appreciate the distance that Pak Mat had to cycle to pick us up and send us to our respective s...

Life's Remains....

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