Short Attention Span

I think I have a dream job. The work environment is laid back, relaxed.... once in awhile we get a project to do but, if we don't achieve the target, we get a mild tongue lashing from a very nice considerate boss. My boss will approve my leave without even looking at why I'm going on leave or for how long. So much so he may come looking for me to ask me something and then realized I am on leave. And, he'd apologize for disturbing me.

Not surprising we have staff who's been here almost all their lives. Mostly women, they started working here after they finish secondary school at 18, got married (some to co workers, some to customers), have children, the children grew up and got married and have children of their own.... This is their lives, they know no other employers and they do not care to know. Ironically, not many of them encourage their children to work here. Maybe on part time basis, while waiting for their SPM results.

This is a utopia.... a shangri-la of employment. There were some animosity among some of them, but otherwise, it like a big family here.

After more than a decade in the construction industry, I was ecstatic when I was offered a job here. It was what I have been praying for. To get away from those engineers who do not understand that there is such thing as procedures and documentations when we want to make payments. Away from incessant calls from subcontractors who never seem to have any money. From bosses who yelled and cussed and cursed.

I have not heard a single expletive since I've been here since 2006.... that I think I miss it. In fact, I am beginning to miss the construction company environment. (Sigh)

This sedate surroundings is starting to take it toll on me. The predictableness of each day, and the simplicity of the minds that I have to deal with makes me long for another change. I cannot imagine how people can do the same thing the same way for decades. I need a change.

This dream must end......

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7 Days to Live

This coming Friday, on December 21, 2012, the planet Nibiru, last seen only by the ancient Sumerians a few thousand years ago, will come around and pass so near our earth that it will shift the poles and cause a cataclysm, wiping all living things on our planet. According to Nancy Lieder, this phenomenon was first predicted to happen in 2003, but when nothing happened then, she postponed it to 2012. Ms Lieder claimed that she was abducted by aliens when she was young and later released so that she can warn all of us of the impending end of the world. Something is going to happen on December 21, some people insists, because that is the last day on the Mayan Calendar. The Mayan Calendar it seems is as accurate as the atomic clock, marking exactly the celestial events for the last 5,000 years. Some say that a meteor will fall to earth and we will then go the way of the dinosaurs. Or.... a huge solar flare occurs, engulfing and annihilating all planets in its path, earth...

Another phase in life.... hers and mine...

I have been in a melancholy mood. I have been unmotivated, wishing that I don't have to go to work. Although, I try to be the type of parent that is practical and always encouraged my children to be independent and self-sufficient, I guess I've always wanted to be there for them. Now, there is this realization that my eldest daughter, doesn't need me anymore. Sending her to college last Sunday, it suddenly occurred to me that she will, from now on, be spending more time away from us. This is what has put me in a pensive mood. And, in a couple of years, my eldest son will leave us and then my other daughter, then finally, my youngest son. I look back at the last 17 years of raising her, I wish I had been a better parent. I wish I was had shown more patience and compassion rather than anger and edginess. I wish I had shown more composure than agitation. Maybe, that is why I find it hard to let go. I have this feeling that I haven't done enough, that I must hang on ...

Pak Mat Beca

I started school in 1971. I went to Sekolah Ismail (Dua), as far as I am concerned the only primary school in the whole universe and every kid must go there or the government will put their parents away forever. The "Dua" or Two (2), does not mean there were two Sekolah Ismails. There was only one, except that there were two sessions, morning and afternoon. When I started in standard one, I was in the morning session. Apparently, somehow, the two Ismails alternate, and I really can't recall ever having to go to school in the afternoon. Every morning, my cousin, the late Hashimah Hashim (Allah bless her soul), and I would wait for Pak Mat to pick us up in his beca, his trishaw. And, until I changed school in 1976 (that's another story to tell), Pak Mat and his beca would take me to school every school day. I know of no other way to go to school and I did not really appreciate the distance that Pak Mat had to cycle to pick us up and send us to our respective s...

Life's Remains....

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